Silly in the Kitchen
(Mid 1990s)

When I was going through my divorce, and using Mark and Brandon’s office as my apartment, I was in a very bad way. I had little money – hardly enough for food. Brandon had brought in some frozen specialty brand hamburger patties that his mother sent him. He put them in the freezer at the office and told me and Mark that we should eat them. Over the next few weeks, the burgers dwindled, but I didn’t have any. I didn’t want to impose. But after a while of seeing the last few burgers just sitting in the freezer, I decided to cook them. Although, I wanted to do something in exchange. I thought cooking the burgers for the guys (and me) might not be enough of a contribution. So, I was thinking about doing something else that they might like.

This was not long after I had left that Fashion Show video for them to find. And Brandon had recently recorded me taking a bubble bath. So, now we had really broken the ice on the topic, and I had started hanging around them naked more often. I knew they were enjoying it.

There was an enormous desk in the main room that took up most of the floor space. They had decided to replace it with smaller workstations. I was in the bedroom while they were in the main room taking apart the desk. I was hungry and thinking about the burgers, so I just went for it. I walked out to the desk, fully nude, and asked if they were hungry. They just stared at me trying to figure out what I was really offering. So, I added that I could cook the burgers for us. Mark had already eaten, but Brandon thankfully agreed.

I thought I would cook as they kept putting the new desks together, but instead, I noticed Brandon with his camera. I got excited, but a little nervous. Mark was still working, but now I felt like I was really putting on a show – more so than I had intended. I awkwardly kept finding silly things to do and say while cooking. I was having fun, but I think my nervousness shows in the video. It was not planned, so much of the recording is pretty rough. Bad audio and lighting, and I was not looking my best. I thought we were just hanging out, so I didn’t prepare at all. And Mark was watching a football game while he worked, which is very loud in the background. But I still post clips from this video now, with the original audio, because there is something about it I like. I think it shows some of my personality.

The video ends before I finished cooking, but when all was ready, we sat on the floor and used pieces of the dismantled desk as a dinner table. I know they were turned on, but I think it was even more exciting for me.

As much as I was poor, and had many problems, I think of this as one of the best times of my life. I was so comfortable around my new friends, and could truly just be myself. I was appreciated while indulging my urges. Although the video is quite rough and low quality, I still want to share it, because this was such a magical time for me.

I hope you enjoy it.