Here's some put-downs from a book I have called "The Art of the Put-Down" collated by someone named Winifred Coles. Feel free to add more.

These first three are by the late great comedienne Joan Rivers:-

Angelina Jolie's lips are so big, she could whisper in her own ear.

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With Mick Jagger's lips, he could French kiss a moose.

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Ladies, when you get out the shower in the morning, do you ever look at your pussy in the long wall mirror? Its like an old man of 90 without any teeth staring back at you.

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The only thing she'll ever do like a virgin is give birth in a stable.
(Bette Midler on Madonna)

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They should give her open heart surgery and go in through her feet.
(Julie Andrews on gossip columnist Joyce Haber)

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Vile, the worst of British values posing as the best.
(Alastair Campbell on that excuse for a newspaper, The Daily Mail)

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Her forehead looks like a flatscreen t.v.
(Sharon Osbourne on Nicole Kidman)

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She speaks five languages and can't act in any of them."
(John Gielgud on Ingrid Bergman)

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Which part is he playing now?
(Author Somerset Maugham on watching Spencer Tracey filming "Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde."

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