It’s true—it is all the WITCHES’ fault.
Now, I know what you’re thinking: “Will, that’s just crazy talk. Everybody who has sense knows that CHINA caused the virus!”

Well, that’s just what the Witches WANT you to think, you poor deluded fool! They are blaming China to hide the TRUTH, and you fell for it!

Sure, you could argue that there is no PROOF that Witches are to blame, but I would argue that the sheer LACK of PROOF is PROOF enough. They covered their tracks so well that there is no evidence that they are guilty. Let the Witches PROVE that they didn’t do it. I would like to see them try.

Of course the Witches will deny that they did it. That’s how they have operated throughout history. Every time a Witch is accused of doing something wrong, the very first thing they do is to claim their innocence. All that DENIAL is pretty damned SUSPICIOUS, no?

Most importantly, I BELIEVE that the Witches did it, so it HAS to be true. Everybody knows that, if you BELIEVE something really, really hard, it makes it TRUE. WANTING a thing to be TRUE makes it TRUE. That’s just how the World works.

And don’t go waving all your SCIENCE and FACTS at me. SCIENCE is too hard to understand, and thinking about it makes my head all hurty. The SCIENTISTS are just trying to CONFUSE us because they are all in CAHOOTS with the Witches. And the only real FACTS are the ones I want to be TRUE; the ones that SUPPORT my BELIEFS. Get your damn Fake News out of my face, Witch Lover!

So, based on my explanation, you can see that the Witches OBVIOUSLY caused the virus. Think about it. Have you ever MET a Witch with the virus? Have you?
I rest my case.